adventures


23
Nov 20

The cat pictures are at the bottom

I dreamed of my grandfather. I know we aren’t supposed to talk about our dreams because they mean little and hold no interest and this one is going nowhere anyway, but it’s my dream and my site. So, I dreamed of my grandfather. He was coming in the front door of his house. They had a smallish house, but big for its time. And it always looked larger from the outside. I suppose everything does from the perpetual memory of youth. He was a young grandfather, and healthy. He was probably still strong and working.

Most of my life that wasn’t the case. He had a few brain aneurysms when I was in junior high and it laid him low. He was working on his truck, he drove 18-wheelers late in his working life, and something between his brain and his heart just couldn’t get along. I suppose it was often like that for him. He recovered a bit, took some therapy, but I don’t think it really took to him, and that was it. For the rest of my life, into my 30s, he was there in almost every way, but couldn’t care for himself. He’d get dizzy if you stood him up to fast. Someone had to walk him even around the house he built. He was sometimes difficult to understand, which frustrated him, because everything was all in his head, he just struggled getting it out.

It made him nicer, in some ways. More patient. As if understanding his own limitations made him understanding of other things. He was pretty much always nice to me, even as a young grandfather, but I have stories that he’d been a hard man to deal with sometimes. But, after his own body humbled him and he became homebound and his working man’s hands grew soft, so did his personality. He was lovely, and yet still humorously opinionated in the way that old men are.

I wish I could tell you I had some conversation with him in the dream, that he gave me some insight or a sign or a tip on next weekend’s games. (He’d pick Roy Jones in that fight, though, and tell you boxing just isn’t what it used to be, and he’d be right.) But it was just a few images and flashes. It was their house, and I was there, but not modern me. Maybe a me out of time. And the furniture wasn’t really right. And the room was brighter than it ever was. The living room had a dark wood panelling and faced the east and was only light by lamps and the TV. It didn’t matter. Everything that happened in that house happened happened in the kitchen. I assume that’s where my grandmother was in the dream, in her kitchen, but I don’t know.

My uncle was there. And he looked like a younger adult in the dream, too, which meant it would have been the louder, cocksure version of himself, rather than the quieter cocksure man he’d age into. The younger uncle stood at the corner of my grandparents’ living room, where the hall and the kitchen and the living room meet. And for some reason, he had a garden tiller in the house, just sitting right there on the carpet.

Like I said, this dream went nowhere. It’s notable only because I seldom remember dreams, and this is the rare case when I do recall a dream, and it included an important person.

And that’s how my off week begins. It isn’t how my holiday started.

This is a story about the windows in our house. Really, it’s a story about our blinds in our house, which means it’s a story about our house.

I was just talking with a friend recently about the condition of some things. We bought this place from a family of eight. There two kids and a newborn, and some of the walls and doors prove it. I was saying that, some of the scratches and gouges and things, I’d leave, because they tell the story of the place. But some should be fixed, if I had the wherewithal, or a good Wherewithal Guy. One day some of them will be repaired and disguised, but the trick would be deciding which few to leave, to honor the kids that used to be here.

It’s a silly thing, probably, but it seems important somehow.

Anyway, a lot of the windows have blinds we inherited. Blinds are great! Precisely until the moment when they are the worst thing in the world. In the master bathroom there are three windows and in the last year or so I’ve replaced all three sets of blinds. One broken down with age and sunlight exposure — or kids rappelling off the wall — and one of the cats broke the other two sets. I hung a few sets of blinds elsewhere in the house, and that was fun.

You shouldn’t call that fun, because that would be a lie, and your house might be more perceptive than you imagine.

So let me try again. I hung a few sets of blinds elsewhere in the house, and that was a horrible, no good experience that I still dwell on when I’m underneath them.

And so it was that, today, we decided to replace the blinds in The Yankee’s office. Because one of the sets had decided that string tension was no longer a desirable attribute.

Having installed the six sets of blinds described above I can tell you this about blinds: the technology has changed since the last time you went blind shopping. You can’t get those with the raising-and-lowering strings on the right side anymore. These days, you adjust the height of your blinds with your mind! And also your hand, which you place along the bottom of the blinds, which somehow correctly interprets which way you want them to go. Also, whatever old school system of installation your blinds have, is now obsolete. Remember how I just told you I’ve installed six sets of blinds in this house? Well now I’ve installed eight. And there are three different sets of hangars at play.

And since I knew those things, we decided to not just replace the failed set of blinds in her office, but their companion blinds, as well. May as well bring both windows up to code.

What could follow is five paragraphs about today’s chore, detailing the moving of the desk, the removal of the old blinds, the removal of the old installation system — which involves breaking plastic and a stripped screw that I removed with a ratchet. I would have told you all about trying to figure out how the new brackets work with the new blinds, because while I hd two sets, only one came with instructions and, wouldn’t you know, they were in the second box. There is also the discussion of the installation of the new style of brackets, still awkward angles, still aching arms, still eight screws, and at least that many dropped screws.

But I won’t tell you those things. We’re already at 1,200 words and there’s still so much to go!

Somewhere during the evening, though, I remembered the blinds in my office window were also ruined. And maybe, juuuust maybe, the still working blinds from her office would fit mine. Not every window is the same size. That’s something you don’t often think about, but that’s something you can ponder the next time you’re locked down.

So, I retrieved her used-but-good blinds, which were ready to be disposed of, and tried them in my office. Same hanging system, meaning, quite possibly for the first time in the history of window covering systems, an easy installation. And here they are:

They look great in my window. I think I’ll keep them, and never touch them so they can’t break.

On Mondays in this space we check in with the cats. I am pleased to report they are both doing splendidly. A few weeks ago Phoebe enjoyed some time in these old grocery sacks.

And two weeks later Poseidon discovered them, as well.

I’d fold up the sacks and put them away for some future use, but they clearly belong to the cats now.

More tomorrow. Until then, did you know that Phoebe and Poseidon have an Instagram account? Phoebe and Poe have an Instagram account. And don’t forget to keep up with me on Twitter and on Instagram. There are also some very interesting On Topic with IU podcasts for you, as well.


20
Nov 20

Giggles and risotto

Quiet day at the office. I sent a few emails, dabbled in some spreadsheets, identified the upcoming tasks and walked some halls. That was about it. It was your typical Friday-before-a-holiday sort of feel. And I have some days off coming, so it was quite the quiet day.

Since we’ve wrapped our in-studio productions, these are some of the last few videos of the semester, notwithstanding things they may produce from afar.

So let’s start off with the late show, which was produced in Studio 5 on Tuesday. They’re bringing the funny:

And last night, in Studio 7, we wrapped it all up the same way we started the semester, sports!

And while you’re waiting on whatever your sports weekend has in store for you, check out my buddy Drew’s last show hosting The Toss Up. They’re talking women’s basketball, and IU’s basketball team promises to be a good one this year. And this show is one of the best of the year. It’s a good way for Drew to sign off:

We expect big things out of that guy, and we know he’s going to come through.

At the end of the day, it was oddly warm. Oddly still. It was 63 degrees and we were in the gloaming and back home it would have been time to watch the barometer. But I studied the forecast earlier in the day and nothing bad was coming our way. It was just … kind of pleasant.

So I did the daily decontamination procedure and went out to sit on the deck. We stayed out there, me trying my hardest to make her laugh, until it got good and dark, when it got nice and chilly.

And my staycation began, as it should, with giggles.


18
Nov 20

No calculator was harmed in the making of this post

It’s a weird time. I have a normal work schedule on Wednesdays. My weeks during the semester are normally split. I’m done at a respectable hour on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Tuesdays and Thursdays are long, but these other days I feel like a normal person. Except I am now old enough to feel the effects of a split schedule in ways I didn’t when I was 23, and so it doesn’t feel especially normal.

I’m honestly not sure how Mondays work anymore, since I’ve largely been working from home on Mondays since March. But I’ve been going in four-days-a-week since July, and in August the students came back and in September we ramped up production and so it went like this. I would leave campus just after 8 p.m. on Tuesdays and then go work a 9-5 day on Wednesdays. And then I would leave the building on Thursdays closer to 9 p.m. and work another regular day on Fridays. Well, on Friday afternoon the weekend feelings kick in. So that is taken care of. But Wednesdays? And now that it’s dark by 5:30. That, of course, presupposes the midwestern cloud cover lets any natural direct light shine through.

Like today, for instance. High 44. It was partly cloudy. And then the sun set (I had no idea the sun came out. I was hiding under fluorescent light all day.) at 5:25. That’s about the time I got to the house. So no bike ride for me. What am I going to do with the evening?

“What did you do with the evening?”

Well, let me tell you, dear and gentle reader. We fact checked a story The Yankee was reading. It was about some lavish meal somewhere. How could all of these things — the story itemized many of the plates — only amount to a little over two grand?

It was, when you heard the many items, a fair question.

So I pulled up the menu for a restaurant 634 miles away and we analyzed the data.

While some specifics were left out of the story, to protect the carnivores, one presumes, we ultimately decided that the total bill was plausible and likely.

And I subsequently decided I needed something better to do.

And did I find it? No, I did not.

But I will.

TV shows, for those who like TV shows. These are the last episodes the news crew will produce in the studio this fall. I am urging them to do more stuff remotely between now and when we reconvene in person in February.

They even teased a winter series of stories in here, which was nice. Now they’re on the record! They have to follow through!

Saying publicly that you’ll do something is a great motivator.

They produced those shows last night, which is why it was just after 8 p.m. when I left our old historic building. It was gratifying to watch the seniors rally the underclassmen and congratulate them on the semester and say all of the things I would normally say. It’s fun to see them slip effortless into those roles.

I was curious how that would work this year because the interpersonal dynamics, by definition, are more restrained than normal. If anything, they’ve found ways to work around and beyond that and be better for it.

We build broadcast pros and leaders around here.

We had two productions running concurrently last night. The two above in Studio 7 and the late night show was being produced in Studio 5. It’ll be out later this week. And all of that means we’ll be shooting the last in-studio shows of the term tomorrow night. Watch this space for me bragging on them.


4
Nov 20

We got a new range

Let us go back to September, when the oven died.

Actually, let’s go back farther. Probably to some point in my childhood, where I managed to permanently confuse the words for oven and stove. It’ll be better here, because I have a backspace button — and this time I’m going to use it! — but if we’re just having a conversation and I say one of those, it’s safe bet that I mean the other. This bothers no one more than me.

Anyway, in September, the oven died. (Yes, the oven, the part where you bake things.) The oven died because we were working on the stove top. We were working on the stove top because someone was using the command dials for mountain climbing exercises. While that work was happening the logic board that controlled the oven just gave up.

We know that’s what it was because it was getting power, but there was nothing in the displays, and it would not bake. We called the home warranty people and they sent a guy down from Indy and he looked at it and said, “Yep, that’s busted.” He contacted the warranty people who said, “Well, it’s busted.”

It was a 13-year-old range, though, probably original in the house. The model, of course, is discontinued. And the warrant people weren’t interested in having their repair vendor work on the thing. So they offered to swap it out. Or we could find our own range and there would be a rebate, compensation song and dance. Ultimately, we went with the one they offered. It was comparable on paper, and the oven — I had to correct this one — would be a smidge larger than the old one.

Problem: Again, this was late September. And the new range was on back order and wouldn’t be available until the first week of November.

So we assembled stove top and grill recipes. And we were ready to get take out a time or two. In the scheme of things, it’s the most minor of inconveniences, but you don’t really know how much you depend on your oven — I had to correct this one, too — until you contemplate how much you actually depend on your oven.

Well, good news! In the last week of October we got the call that they had our range, and when would we like it? We arranged to have it arrive last Friday. I was going to come back from the office to let them in and do their thing. They would call between 2 and 6 p.m. And somewhere in that appointed time I received a call. The delivery guy had a traffic accident and would not be delivering it on Friday.

After about an hour-and-a-half on the phone with both the delivery people and the appliance manufacturer’s people, it was unilaterally arranged to arrive today. By the way, if you think dealing with one group for a slightly exotic problem with your service is a chore, try it with two, and with people who each aren’t exactly sure what the other does. (The answers, of course, being manufacture/sale and deliver.)

So this morning, 8 a.m. to noon, this range is coming. Because they only come down this way two days a week. Never mind that we’re about six weeks into our descent into creative kitchen work. At noon, no range and no phone call. So when my three-hour webinar wound down for the day — this week, honestly … — I called them. The delivery guy, it turns out, was running a bit late. Safety first when driving! And we were next.

And so we were.

Did you know that they don’t install a range when the delivery people deliver it? That’s what we were told, by the warranty people, but the delivery guy isn’t interested in that.

And did you know you have to provide your own power supply? I’ve never bought a range before, this was a new thing to me. Who knew?! I did not!

So after work I went to the hardware store and bought a four prong heavy duty power supply. I watched two YouTube videos to make sure I only needed to watch the first one, and then I lay on the floor connected the power supply to the range and we set it into place:

And then we had dinner.

The other one looked better, if you ask me. It’s a difference of about 11 percent. We’ll see about the functionality, but the stove top dials were aesthetically nicer on the old unit, and they were shorter. And on this thing the buttons are stiff and unpleasing to punch.

But the eyes and the oven work. And we upgraded a 13-year-old range for a brand new one, thanks to the home warranty. And dinner, from the oven, was delicious.


26
Oct 20

I got a sticker today

Saturday was probably the last fine day for the foreseeable future. Certainly it’s the last time the weather service has had cause to use their sun graphics in the longterm forecasts. So we are settling in for the long grim winter. I guess we’ll be happier about it in mid-April.

I mean, we’ll be pleased with the change to better weather in mid-April, but you, of course, know I’ll look for new and inventive ways to say the same tired things about this gray place, and why it takes that long to burn off the winter here.

Anyway, we enjoyed the sunshine, and the chilly temperatures, that Saturday offered with a nice little bike ride. Here’s some video from the later parts of it:

The sun was nice, and will be missed.

Today we stood under the gray sky and performed our patriotic duty to vote, or as the kids these days are saying, “We did a democracy.” I’ll be working next Tuesday, and we are afforded some time off for the process, but if you can avoid the lines in a fashion that is presumptively more convenient, you avoid the lines in a fashion that is presumptively more convenient.

It started out under a very attractive maple tree:

And it wound up at a door like this:

Along the way some other things happened:

They meant more than the guy who would randomly go “Whoooo! WHO IS READY TO VOTE?!” It’s not a pep rally, friend. But thanks, I guess. Anyway, it took just about an hour. It was easy and inside the office space was a bit perfunctory, practiced, like the last night of a haunted house’s performance, but without the scary part. Aside from a few Boomers, who need to up their mask games, it was well ordered and stress-free.

Early voting in Indiana runs through Nov. 2nd. You can find out the rules for where you are at this link. Then, go educate yourself on the issues — up and down the ballot! — that matter to you, put on a mask and go pull the lever, punch the chad, fill in the bubble or whatever system your local government uses. You, too, can do a democracy!