December « 2011 « Kenny Smith | A remarkable thing happens …

December, 2011

adventures / Auburn / photo / Thursday — Comments Off
22
Dec 11

The Christmas card picture

It has come to our attention — mostly because one of my grandmothers brought it up today — that there might be some confusion about the Christmas card. So, if you received this lovely image on thick stock of our happy and charming faces, please allow me to explain.

To my family: this is not someone in The Yankee’s family.

To The Yankee’s family: these are not people from my family.

At a football game late in the year we saw Aubie Claus here taking pictures with kids.

He and Mrs. Aubie Claus let us take a picture, too. File this under one of those unique little college town experiences.

So War Eagle, and Merry Christmas, from Auburn.

journalism / Twitter / video / Wednesday — Comments Off
21
Dec 11

News at 10

I feel disconnected here, because my computer time is drastically cut short compared to work and home. That’s fine, and as it should be, but this makes news junkies twitchy.

There might be news! Someone could write a compelling essay and link to it on Twitter! What if I miss a really great joke? Or what if there’s a brand new meme!?

Life is hard, I know.

I read the local paper this afternoon. The Times Daily‘s lead story today has to do with a lack of funding for the local landfill:

With a depleted Solid Waste Fund temporarily carrying the load for garbage disposal, the City Council must find another source of money to meet state and federal requirements for the eventual closing and monitoring of its landfill.

Dan Barger, city treasurer/chief accountant, told the council Tuesday that more than $2 million is needed to satisfy requirements for landfill closure. He said it probably will have to come from the General Fund.

The Environmental Protection Agency requires owners and operators of municipal solid waste landfills to show proof they have adequate funds earmarked for closure costs and monitoring the landfill for 30 years after closure, Barger said.

Because the Solid Waste Fund has operated with losses of more than 5 percent the past two years, he said that fund no longer satisfies the financial tests necessary to guarantee closure operations.

The print version had to do with only two weeks worth of space remaining in the current landfill cell. The council has been split for some times, it seems, along a 3-3 vote, on whether to add to the existing space or ship off trash to a third-party site. The mayor, the story said, had had enough and last night started naming names.

My grandparents have taken to watching the city council meetings on television. They don’t even live within the city limits. That’s how entertaining these meetings can be. And you’ve been shirking your civic duty.

Also watched the local 5 p.m. news. The lead story on the B-block was the traditional Better Business Bureau story warning you of e-card scams. Someone had to write a tease for that piece. But it was a relatively slow news day. There was a fatal car accident and two men were caught in a check stealing scheme.

Shame they didn’t have this footage of a dog terrorizing the local stuffed citizenry:

Finished the Christmas shopping today with a whimper. The last thing I picked up was a gift card.

family / iPhone / photo / Tuesday — Comments Off
20
Dec 11

Can I be through shopping yet?

Winter is here. The ladybugs are coming inside.

“Just hanging out on the tail light. You weren’t planning on going anywhere were you? Think of all of the aphids that could pop up if I blew off your car miles away. You should probably just stay here.”

The biggest part of winter, so far, has been the complete absence of the sun. If there’s any consolation to the ladybug thing, however, it is that tomorrow is the longest night of the year. And with the shortest day of the year soon behind us, we have plenty to look forward to!

The optimist on the first day of winter is a fool before the last freeze of spring.

Family and shopping today. Picked up a bicycle for a secret Santa gift. Did this at K-Mart, where they have three registers open during the Christmas rush. There is a reason they work at K-Mart. It is a nice little bike, though. The unsuspecting older man that will get this gift is due an upgrade. He pedals a hand-me-down to the store and back home again, but the brakes are gone and the gears are shot.

Finished shopping for my mother. Failed at shopping for my grandparents.

If you fail at three places in a row you should just go home. And so we did.

Family visiting, picked up Chinese food, made a drug store run and then watched the night drift away on the History Channel.

Tomorrow will be a lot like today.

iPhone / Monday / photo — Comments Off
19
Dec 11

Travel day

Hit the road, Jack.

“There’s no place like the interstate for the holidays … ”

Woke up this morning for breakfast, but the Barbecue House was closed. Everyone who’s ever been in the parking lot of a closed restaurant has muttered oaths and proclaimed the owners as losers of money. You want to spend yours there, after all. But who knows what drove the man to make this choice?

Maybe he just wanted a break. Maybe opening for lunch at 10 means he can sleep in until 8. Maybe he has a problem with biscuits. Maybe there’s a shortage of butter.

You never know. (Though I’ll ask Mr. Price next time I see him.) You just go find breakfast somewhere else. So we went to Cracker Barrel, where there are neither barrels nor crackers. Breakfast. And then packed for the first of the holiday adventures.

After packing — or maybe it was during? — I had to take a short nap. Apparently all of my energy hasn’t yet returned.

So. Finished packing. I had my oil changed before leaving and the guy noticed I have a blown headlight.

I’ll fix that, then.

“Well … The dealerships like you to bring these in because there’s a seal … ”

Designers have begun engineering cars to so completely befuddle the average owner that you must bring your car back to the dealership.

I called the dealership to ask them about how much this would cost.

About $175, to $310, depending on the kind of light in it, he said.

So I’ll be doing that at home. Not that I’d intended to take the thing in. I believe I can turn the wheel, turn a 10mm wrench and find 10 minutes to spare.

Halfway through the drive there was a visit to the mall, which was actually painless, and then a bookstore for a brief bout of Christmas shopping. Dinner at Jim ‘N’ Nicks in Gardendale — has the chain gone downhill since we left town or just that store? — and then the rest of the drive. Lots of driving.

Made it in just before midnight. Everyone was already asleep. Oh yes, the road hits back.

history / movies / photo / weekend — Comments Off
18
Dec 11

Happy Birthday

Lazlo Hollyfeld, the impossibly old undergrad living between the walls in Real Genius was 28 when he won 32.4 percent of the Frito-Lay “Enter-as-often-as-you-want” sweepstakes.

By the age of 30 Alexander the Great had built one of the largest empires the ancient world had ever known, ranging from the Ionian Sea to the Himalayas.

Rocky Balboa — in Rocky III! — was a washed up ex-champ fighting to regain his title at the age of 34.

I’m now older than all of them.