Alabama « Kenny Smith | A remarkable thing happens …

Alabama

You still have to lick envelopes?

I sent letters today. Actual correspondence. With stamps and everything!

Now I’m exhausted.

I also had to prepare new copies of my transcripts for the dean at Samford. Once upon a time you walked into an office or made a phone call and started the process. These days, of course, it is all online. Also, this costs money. I have three colleges to send away to, so it costs a few bucks.

Interestingly the price varies. It seems my grades at one school are more valuable than the other two.

So, to review, you pay tuition to have the privilege to go to classes. You earn your grades. You pay to graduate. Years later, you must pay again, to retrieve the grades you earned.

Terrific scam.

One of my schools charged $11. Another $12. Another $15. The third-party firms will ship an electronic version of your grades, a PDF, which will self-destruct after three views. Printed “allowed.” Copying? Not allowed.

Linky things: Somebody had to do it, may as well be John Archibald, writing the “if only everything else were as important here as football” column:

And never, ever, accept mistakes you could correct.

Alabamians — Alabama and Auburn fans alike — accept no less from their football teams. It’s amazing what they accept off the field.

Alabama was fourth-worst in the nation last year in robberies, and fifth-worst in murders, according to CQ Press.

It ranked in the bottom five in overall health last year, according to the United Health Foundation. It was 49th in obesity, infant mortality and premature deaths.

The state was 47th in teaching math and science, according to the American Institute of Physics.

It was in the bottom 10 in traffic fatalities per vehicle mile, in poverty rates and energy consumption per person, according to the census.

Alabama is not No. 1. Unless you count our highest-in-the-country rate of diabetes.

If life in Alabama were football, somebody would be fired.

Alabama’s last daughter of the confederacy has died. Someone in the comments of the last daughter story says that her father was 81 when she was born. Apparently they have pictures, too. One presumes of sometime after her birth. She is survived by, among others, her brother, who is the last surviving son of the confederacy.

That’s a lot to wrap your mind around, but then the last Civil War widow died just eight years ago.

State of the Media: This is from Vocus, a media software firm:

152 papers ceased operations in 2011. Of the papers that closed, not one major daily went under—the first year since 2009 that a top-tier paper didn’t shut down.

[…]

(T)here were a total of 195 magazine launches in 2011 with the unveiling of new consumer titles taking a modest hit.

[…]

(O)nline streaming of television shows and newscasts continued to increase.

[…]

(T)raditional radio continued to prove it’s a survivor, despite evidence that the majority of people prefer to get their news elsewhere. In all four quarters, reports showed growth in radio listenership.

Vocus’ full, optimistic, report will be out later this month.

Alabama / Auburn / football / friends / Monday — Comments Off
9
Jan 12

Steamy January Monday

Went downtown to take pictures of a building today. It was a darkly overcast and muggy 69 degrees.

There was a rumor that the name of a restaurant was changing. It would have been one of those generational, epochal turning moments. One crowd would understand the now 40-year-old reference, but it didn’t stick with the younger set in quiet the same way. Institutions can only be institutions until the paying crowd asks for an explanation. And that’s a chilling moment for a merchant. If you have a clever spelling but it is misinterpreted, people may start going across the street.

Or that would have been the thinking. And thinking like that in a college town is important, especially when you’re dealing with timely cultural references. But this particular restaurant was not changing their name. They were just painting their facade. And, also, they’d hung a new sign referencing another, newer cultural touchstone. But they were not renaming the place.

You could see the confusion, however. New paint, new temporary sign, updated context.

“We may,” the guy said “name the porch that though.”

No you won’t, because that makes even less sense.

So there was that.

Got to play with a friend’s two daughters. The youngest is just a smile machine. She also likes her jumper contraption, the lowest setting of which she has outgrown as of today. His oldest daughter is in elementary school and is a budding entrepreneur. She planned out a lemonade standing, a hot chocolate stand and a petting sitting service all in on conversation. Meanwhile her younger sister was chattering and banging plastic things together and always bouncing. The older girl never missed a beat. It was remarkable, and just a little bit exhausting.

Otherwise just computer things and housework, which interrupted the computer things. Did some laundry. Discovered a hazard.

It seems the vent from the dryer had come disconnected. It was a little too hot and dryer-like standing in the laundry room. Look behind the thing and, yep, there’s a great big silver hose going nowhere while the dryer is happily spinning away.

So I turn it off. Pull out the washer and dryer. Unplug it. The outlet is covered in condensation.

If there’s one place you don’t want condensation it is on your fine wood furniture. But if there are two places you don’t want condensation it is on your fine wood furniture and glass tabletops. And if there are three places you don’t want condensation it your fine wood furniture, glass tabletops and electrical outlets.

Dry that off, clean the floor, connect the vent and count my blessings. Only thing could I get back to the laundry.

And the rest of the day was tinkering on the computer, Chinese food and the big game, which was only slightly riveting. But, hey, that’s a Monday for ya.

Alabama / Auburn / cycling / football / Monday — Comments Off
2
Jan 12

A day of football

Slept in, mostly because I stayed up late. I stayed up late mostly because I didn’t fell well the night before. Something I’d eaten didn’t agree with me. When that unpleasantness passed me by I slipped under an electric blanket for a hibernation.

And so then there was a lot of football today. Somewhere along the way Ross Collings started examining Georgia’s big game performances in recent years. That turned into this long bout of schedule staring.

This is what I did during breaks in the football action today: the complete SEC story of victories against teams that finished in the top 25 of the BCS for the years between 2008-2011.

They are sorted by the most successful program against their opponents in terms of raw wins – no style points, home/away, injuries, upsets or other considerations have been made. Each school has a list of the year of the game, the team they defeated and that opponent’s final BCS ranking of that season.

All efforts have been made to keep this accurate, but your eyes get dizzy looking through 14 teams’ four years of scheduling. No, seriously, have a look. The source links for the BCS rankings are below. If you find any errors, write them in the comments.

As you can see, LSU has had an impressive run, particularly the last two years. They’re neck and neck with Alabama. In fact, the best part of the upcoming BCS title game is that it will break a tie between the two programs. Auburn is next in terms of wins over BCS ranked opponents. Not bad when you consider that we’re talking about 2008-2011 here.

LSU**
2008: Georgia Tech (14)
2010: Alabama (16)
2010: Texas A&M (17)
2010: Miss State (21)
2010: West Virginia (22)
2011: Alabama (2)
2011: Oregon (5)
2011: Arkansas (6)
2011: Georgia (16)
2011: West Virginia (23)
2011: Auburn (25)
**LSU and Alabama meet for the perfunctory rematch on Jan. 9.

Alabama**
2008: Georgia (15)
2008: Mississippi (25)
2009: Texas (2)
2009: Florida (5)
2009: Virginia Tech (11)
2009: LSU (12)
2010: Arkansas (8)
2010: Michigan State (9)
2010: Miss State (21)
2011: Arkansas (6)
2011: Auburn
**LSU and Alabama meet for the perfunctory rematch on Jan. 9.

Auburn
2009: West Virginia (16)
2010: Arkansas (8)
2010: Oregon (2)
2010: LSU (11)
2010: Alabama (16)
2010: South Carolina (20)
2010: South Carolina (20) SECCG
2010: Miss State (21)
2011: South Carolina (9)

Arkansas*
2010: LSU (11)
2010: Texas A&M (17)
2010: Miss State (21)
2011: South Carolina (9)
2011: Auburn (25)
*Hogs play BCS #8 Kansas State on Jan. 6.

Florida
2008: Oklahoma (1)
2008: Alabama (4)
2008: Georgia (15)
2009: Cincinnati (3)
2009: LSU (12)

South Carolina
2008: Mississippi (25)
2010: Alabama (16)
2011: Clemson (15)
2011: Nebraska (20)

Ole Miss
2008: Florida (2)
2008: Texas Tech (7)
2009: LSU (12)
2009: Oklahoma State (19)

Georgia
2008: Michigan State (18)
2009: Georgia Tech (9)
2011: Auburn (25)

Missouri
2008: Northwestern (23)
2010: Texas A&M (17)
2010: Oklahoma (7)

Texas A&M
2010: Oklahoma (7)
2010: Nebraska (18)
2011: Baylor (12)

Vanderbilt
2008: Mississippi (25)
2008: Boston College (24)

Kentucky
2010 Carolina (20)

Tennessee
None

Mississippi State
None

This would look very pretty, and reveal something, I’m sure, if you put it in the appropriate type of chart or infographic.

Update: The War Eagle Reader has picked this list up, too.

Also I added a CatEye computer to my bike today. This was a thoughtful Christmas gift from The Yankee and, in that spirit, I attached it in that spirit. I’m never good at building or installing the first of something. Sure, there are instructions, but there’s always some detail missing, or an extra part that psyches me out, or a missing part whose absence can defeat even the heartiest of spirits. Or, more to the point, some small thing I didn’t notice in the illustration.

This computer requires a magnet on the spokes, a sensor attached to the fork no more than five millimeters away, and then the computer itself, attached in a four-part ceremony to the handlebars. The computer must be no more than 70 millimeters away from the sensor, and the back of the computer must be facing the sensor. And, also, it must spend at least 48 percent of each lunar cycle pointing to magnetic north.

All but one of those facts are true.

So there was first the incorrect installation of the sensor on the fork. Then there was struggling through the computer, programming the clock, tire circumference and the always troubling 12-hour or 24-hour setup. Then there was mounting the computer in the four-part handlebar bracket, which was its own series of curiosities. After which I discovered I couldn’t remove the computer from the bracket.

A few engineers were consulted and we finally concluded that our instincts are wrong and sometimes you must force it.

So now the sensor, the magnetic it is detecting for movement and the computer are all mounted. I pick up the front wheel and spun it, the first test to see if the computer and sensor are communicating. One of the LCD elements in the crystal should be flashing.

It is not.

The first troubleshooting element is the sensor and magnet configuration. They must be no more than five millimeters apart. Not six, because that is not in the Holy Book of Armaments. So I nudged over the senor a bit closer to the magnet mounted on the spokes. Pick up the bike, spin the wheel, the LCD flashes. The computer works.

This should have taken about six minutes. It took me the better half of one half of a football game.

So the first time is always a challenge. It could have been that I was working from the Korean instructions. Next time I’ll use the English version.

The second time was a breeze. I installed the same computer on her bike. It was done in no time flat. Now we are ready to ride and see, truly, how fast — or slow — we are going. And, of course, if you’re dissatisfied with the speed you can always reprogram the computer’s understanding of your tire circumference.

So you can imagine why digging up that list of football victories above was a good way to spend a windy evening. There’s an impressive, and thankfully temporary cold front blowing in just now. We won’t break 40 degrees tomorrow. I’ll try out my new cycling computer on Wednesday.

Alabama / Auburn / football / photo / weekend — Comments Off
27
Nov 11

Catching up

Tons of pictures this week, so they are broken up into two posts. This one covering the Iron Bowl, the previous one touching on some of the Thanksgiving festivities.

First, the ever-popular panorama of Jordan-Hare Stadium. Click to embiggen:

Here’s a tilt shift of midfield, late in the game as Alabama prepared to kick off to Auburn:

Fans:

What is wrong with this picture?

Oh. Well then.

Many more pictures can be found in the November photo gallery.

Alabama / Auburn / photo / weekend — 2 Comments
26
Nov 11

At the Iron Bowl, a hero

Fine, beautiful day. Many lovely experiences. Unfortunately the game, in its entirety, was not one of them. It had its moments, though. We will not speak of it, but of something far more important.

We often talk fatuously in a sports context about heroes and courage. In recent years even the people who discuss it sometimes acknowledge the hyperbole. There’s no getting around this, though: today we were in the company of a legitimate hero.

Lance Cpl. Kyle Carpenter, USMC, served in Afghanistan, specifically Helmand Province, where a year ago this week he put himself between a fellow Marine and a Taliban hand grenade.

He lost his right eye. Most of his teeth were knocked out of his head. His face was blown apart. His arm was mangled. His best friend in-country was seriously injured, but survived.

Carpenter was 21 at the time. All he remembers, he says, is a white flash and then a fellow Marine telling him he would be OK and a voice that said “Oh my God.” He woke up in Germany a month later with family at his side. He has been through almost 40 surgeries already, with more to come on his long road of recovery.

Lance Cpl. Kyle Carpenter has been nominated for the Medal of Honor.

Lucky to be alive, feeling guilty that his buddy still got hurt and that he is not still in active duty, Carpenter has a common stake with other heroes, as he told The Post and Courier:

“The light is on me right now,” he said. “But I’m hoping what happened to me will help remind people that things like this happen every day and people don’t see it. I’m proud of what my fellow Marines have done there and are doing there now.”

His father is an Auburn graduate, and he grew up an Auburn fan. He’s been to games before, but this was his first Iron Bowl.

Today I had the opportunity to briefly speak with him. It was a privilege to wish this gracious, humble, normal young man well in his continued recovery.

Semper Fidelis, Lance Cpl. Carpenter.