Reflex is a dangerous thing

I had a great day yesterday, coaxing myself into being studiously lazy. This, I thought over and over, will be good for my arm. So I did my little therapy and didn’t overdo it otherwise.

It is easy to overdo it, actually. Even the smallest general exertion can wear me down right now. I suppose that is the surgery and everything that comes with it. Or maybe I just pound the ground when I walk and my shoulder is tired of absorbing things. It feels like there’s a giant water balloon in there. If I fell in a pool right now I’d sink left shoulder first, I’m certain. Between that and being transfixed by the swelling and self conscious about caring for it have entirely changed my self-perception.

I talked with some of the little kids in my family on the phone today. Yes, I’m OK. No, I’m not in the hospital. Yes, I had surgery. Yeah, that hurt a bit. The helmet kept me from having truly horrendous, medical problems and I am very lucky, so wear your helmet, kiddos. This is my role to the next generation in the family, serving as a cautionary tale.

They asked me if I’d come ride with them at their house when I could. Of course I will. But for now I have to take it easy and rest and do everything one-handed and so on.

And then I was making myself a little grape snack later in the evening. I rinsed off the beautiful green treats and dropped them in a mug. I overfilled the mug and the last three grapes rolled off the mound, onto the counter and ultimately the floor. Naturally I reached out to try to catch them. Of course my left hand was the closest. And this produced the most remarkable pain in my shoulder and collarbone, the site of my Monday surgical procedure.

grapes

I spent the next few seconds yelling, and the next few moments remembering to breathe. Finally I had to look at the incision. Did I tear it? No. Did I break something? I don’t think so, there’s titanium in there now, after all, but still, this sensation … Did it hurt?

For four hours.

So, no, I’m not going to write about this every day. I’ll deliberately find other things to write about because I know you don’t care that much. But it is important to remember: don’t do that. Sometimes you have to allow yourself to lose a little produce. Moving without thinking can be a remarkably painful thing.

At least I can sleep in my bed again. Did that for the first time since I wrecked. And I slept about six hours last night, which might also be the best rest I’ve had in a week. Between that and already feeling improvements, morale is definitely high.

We walked around outside for a few minutes today talking about trees and shade and wondering why our elm sheds so much. If ever you need kindling, we can set you up. How there’s any tree left up in the canopy is a mystery.

Brian stopped by for a few minutes, on the way from here to there. He did not want to see my incision — not that I blame him — but we of course discussed the recovery since he was there two weeks ago for the injury.

Also this evening we visited the little vegetable store this that is tacked onto one of the plant nurseries in town. I took a lot of quick pictures there to post later on the Tumblr blog. I finished uploading the discarding fishing lures I found on the pier at Orange Beach there today, so it needs new content.

So be sure to surf over to my Tumblr and check that out. And if those pictures don’t captivate you, there’s always Twitter.

More, as they say, tomorrow!

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